Detox · Personal · Self Care · Social Media

T-Minus 4

Today marks 4 weeks until my social media detox is over. 3 months has felt sluggish and yet sped by. Can I go back to the main social media platforms? I still have one more month of chosen quiet. I don’t know that I’ll return. If I choose to it’s to keep in contact with a select flew.

Part of me wants to scrub it from my life. Even to add into the mix Good Reads. Recently Jesnevertheless made a great point. She mentioned how sites like Good Reads has turned the joy of reading into a competition rather than a means to share one’s love of reading. I’m a sucker for a reading goal. This year I’m barely over half way to my own reading goal and that’s ok. Instead of focusing on enjoying the books I’m reading I could be internally freaking out I’m not going to reach my 2021 challenge. My focus is misplaced.

I also, have felt like book blogging is in its self a competition of sorts. It doesn’t help that I NetGalley request splurge like a drunk going on a shopping spree at midnight. I’ve felt convicted in this department. No more requests!

So will I be back on the usual social media suspects next month? Potentially and possibly not. I have provided direct contact to a few friends and for the most part there has been silence during my detox. Maybe they thought I want privacy or something. Who knows. All I know is that social media is a communication crutch to replace direct communication. You’re viewed like you’ve died if you leave the platform and welcomed back when you return.

Detox · Personal

One Month

It’s one over 1 month of being off major social media platforms. It’s been silent like a tomb. It’s like taking a step outside a snow globe. I’ll be honest. It’s lonely. Will this fact sucker me to return after my detox? I’m not sure. We shall see come January.

Personal

Dear Gabby

Dear Gabby,

Your case has captured the world. I’m just sad it had to be because you had to end up being a domestic abuse statistic. It should have been prevented and averted.

I’m sorry that the police didn’t see the real signs and save you. You were so distressed and upset, while Brian was being all cocky and chatty with the police. There was no real concern coming from Brian that you we’re having an anxiety attack of sorts.

My personal observation from watching the police body cam footage was disturbing. Being condescending towards a woman in true distress is infuriating. Gabby was petrified and her distress seemed to be played down instead of being taken seriously. A little spat wouldn’t have someone being as upset as Gabby was. If she was the true aggressor in the fight with Brian she would have been angry I’d think, but no she was extremely upset.

Your case has brought to mind that abuse is not merely something that can be physical. It can be emotional, psychological, financial and spiritual. Culturally we just think of it as being physical. How many are out there, both men and women, who are being psychologically and emotionally abused? No, physical signs that show red flags. This abuse can seem invisible unless someone is brave to speak up.

I hope your case will open the door to more conversations about DV and how as a society we can become more aware of the signs. You won’t have died in vain. Thankful your parents are working to help others escape it.

Detox · Self Care · Social Media

Detox Week 2

Today is 2 weeks of me surviving being off of social media. It felt at first challenging to not want to log on, but now that I’ll be going into week 3, that urge is dissipating. I think I’m starting to get used to the silence. It’s like being invisible, though you are very much alive.

Will I return come January 15th/16th? I might. I might not. Will returning change anything? The only thing I see it changing is providing an easy way for people to stay in contact. That’s it. Will people reach out more when and if I return? I highly doubt it. Maybe I’m transforming into a pessimist, but when society lives virtually is it really all that surprising?

True connection has been turned into a little box to type, add cute emoji’s to match the mood and sentiment. Sterile. As a society we’ve settled for digital affection. Our brains have gotten used to our Pavlovian response to notifications. Will our virtual life get likes? Does anyone give a bleep? It seems we are gradually going from flesh and blood humans into technical beings. Is that progress? Honestly I believe it’s by design, planned and not an accident. We’ve become digital zombies and that’s what they want.

Detox

Detox Interview

Thanks to my BFF Ashley who inspired me to join her in a 90 day social media detox. She thought it’d be fun to interview her on how her detox is going so far. Below are her thoughts and answers to my questions. Enjoy. It just may inspire you to join us.

What inspired you to do a 90 day detox?
I was on my phone too much. Mainly on FB. It’s highly addictive and there is mostly politics on there. It’s really depressing now. You’re hearing you get reprimanded for certain posts. I find myself scrolling for no reason. Now I don’t see the point with FB, they’re silencing people. It’s become not a respectable company. Social media is addictive. Doctors have said it’s a bad habit of hunching over and people don’t talk to each other any more. For example when, having family time family members will just be on their phones. The evolution of technology is doing more harm than good.

Why did you pick 90 days instead of 30?
I think 90 is more of a challenge. Having a longer time to go without it is more beneficial.


What positives have come out of this so far? I’m more productive. I feel relieved, liberated and free. I don’t have the urge to check my social media. I’m able to concentrate on certain things. Now when I get off work I immediately plug my phone in to charge it and leave it there.

What negatives have come out of this so far? I find myself having the urge to check my phone to check the time. I only check my email and text messages. It shows how the addiction to technology has developed. If you don’t check your social media when you have it you may get anxiety.


What advice would you give to someone contemplating taking a detox off social media?Start small. For example try to set an alarm to only check your social media for a certain time frame. Get to a point where you challenge yourself to be off it for 90 days and see how it affects you, good or bad.

Detox · Social Media

Detox: Day 7

Well today marks day 7 of being off major social media platforms. Boy is it quiet. It truly puts into perspective how a lot of communication is strictly virtual via a social media platform instead of by direct communication.

Honestly it’s depressing. Maybe others feel like they want to give me the personal space while I do this 90 days of no social media. On the other hand, it’s proving that as soon as I jump back on I’ll probably get an assortment of “Welcome back,” comments. Though I’ve been accessible this whole time.

Am I going to return to social media? The depressed side of me is like, “I can’t not go back….how will people keep in contact with me easily?” The healthy side of me is like, “Why shackle yourself again to the addiction?”

A week in feels like it’s been months. That’s just how tough this detox is. And to think I still have a long way to go till 1-15-22.

Detox · Social Media

Detox Day 1

Recently one of my best friends shared she was going to do a 90 day social media detox. I thought that sounded like a great idea. A month detox is good, but a 3 month detox sounded epic. If you can change a habit within twenty something days, then you could really change a habit in a big way after 90.

It’s weird to be off the grid minus Good Reads and blogging. It feels like I’ve entered my own private cave and all the worldly noise is gone. It will be interesting to see if anyone directly contacts me. I highly doubt it. That fact alone speaks volumes about social media. It’s a communication crutch. Yes, it’s easy to update multiple people all at once, but is it truly personable and do people truly bare their soul online? Only the occasional person does.

I’m excited to see how many books I can finish by the end of the year. I doubt I will reach my goal of 100, but that’s ok. I just want to enjoy reading for once.

Books

Author Q & A For: Lifeline To Marionette

A Q&A with Jennifer Waitte

Author, Lifeline to Marionette

 

Question: You have a journalism background, why did you choose to move into fiction?

Jennifer Waitte: My interest in creative writing actually predates my journalism career. When I was in grade school, I was always writing short stories and poems. In college, I originally majored in architecture because I loved architectural history and design, but I failed miserably in anything mathematical. I switched to English, and I loved English lit but worried about my career options as an English major. I switched again to journalism after deciding I wanted to focus on editorial and feature writing for magazines, and eventually be a magazine editor. All through college and my early journalism career, I continued to write fiction, mostly short stories. Overall, I just loved writing features about interesting people. As a result, my novels are character-driven stories.

 

Question: What themes in Lifeline to Marionette do you most want to highlight and why?

Jennifer Waitte: The effects of societal pressures, the hopeless trap of drug addiction, and the damage caused by exploitation are the primary themes that are the backbone of the story. It is also a love story, albeit a dark one.

 

Question: What character do you hope most resonates with readers and why?

Jennifer Waitte: Definitely Alaina Michelle Sekovich. I want my readers to sympathize with her and cultivate compassion for her as they come to understand the disparity between what she is (a celebrity) and the pressures she faces, and who she is, which is a lonely and misunderstood young woman. Ultimately, I want readers to find her damaged yet endearing.

 

Question: Please describe your writing process.

Jennifer Waitte: I spend a lot of time thinking about my storyline and my characters’ personalities, motives and actions before writing. I develop an outline first, so I know where the story is going, and then I go back and work on different sections solely based on what I feel like working on. I don’t write beginning to end. Lifeline to Marionette takes place over a short period of time, which is two weeks. The sequel, The Fifth Language, also takes place over a short period of time, which is about a month. In both books, readers learn about my characters’ lives, but the actual plot unfolds over a short period of time. 

 

Question: Are there any writers or specific books that influenced you as you were writing Lifeline to Marionette?

Jennifer Waitte: There is one book that truly inspired me to start writing again, and that was The Resurrection of Joan Ashby, by Cherise Wolas. It’s a brilliant, well-written story about a writer resurrecting her writing career. What influenced me while I was writing Lifeline to Marionettewas not another novel, but music. I have a Lifeline to Marionette playlist, and each scene/situation in the story is a certain song or a collection of songs. The main character was inspired by a song. 

 

Jennifer Waitte is an award-winning journalist, editor and author. She is a graduate of California Polytechnic University-San Luis Obispo, and holds a bachelor’s degree in journalism.

For 15 years, Waitte worked as a writer and editor for numerous lifestyle, equine and equestrian sporting magazines. She has won many awards for her writing, editing and editorial direction.

 

Waitte is an avid equestrian. She competes in the sport of long-distance horse racing and dressage. She lives in Napa, California, with her husband Barry. They own Tamber Bey Vineyards, a boutique winery located in Napa Valley.   

Connect with Jennifer Waitte at JenniferWaitte.com, Facebook.com/jenniferwaitteauthor and Instagram.com/JenniferWaitte.

 

Lifeline to Marionette will be available at Amazon.